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____/ Chris Ahlstrom on Sunday 21 Aug 2011 13:28 : \____
> Homer wrote this copyrighted missive and expects royalties:
>
>> Verily I say unto thee that Roy Schestowitz spake thusly:
>>
>>> Does Apple have labs at all?
>>
>> It has a big room with empty egg boxes glued to the walls, where it
>> tested the iPhoney's broken antenna.
>>
>> http://www.apple.com/antenna
>>
>> Obviously that didn't work, so they built a lab that experiments with
>> different type of rubber "bumpers" instead. This is handy, because it
>> also lets them make the rubber hoses they need to torture reporters who
>> leak information, at an underground facility sub-leased from the US army
>> at Guantanamo Bay.
>>
>> It also has a psychology testing facility called WWDC in San Francisco,
>> where they lock test subjects into an auditorium, offer them free gifts,
>> and brainwash them for several hours, using well established techniques
>> such as flashing lights and neuro-linguistic programming. They're then
>> released back into the wild and monitored for the rest of their lives,
>> using a tracking device built into the iPhoney.
>>
>> But Apple's most impressive lab by far is in China, where it takes
>> abandoned female infants and rears them hydroponically using solar power
>> and seawater, making slave labourers who assemble iGadgets in sweatshops
>> for virtually free, using ideas and components stolen from others.
>
> A most dystopian vision. <shudder>
Apple would be easier to to defeat than Microsoft because it's based on
illusions more than on crime. To challenge crime you need to chase
lazy regulars; to do the former you need to chase mentally-challenged
people like the resident Mac troll.
- --
~~ Best of wishes
Dr. Roy S. Schestowitz (Ph.D. Medical Biophysics), Imaging Researcher
http://Schestowitz.com | GNU/Linux administration | PGP-Key: 0x74572E8E
Editor @ http://techrights.org & Broadcaster @ http://bytesmedia.co.uk/
GPL-licensed 3-D Othello @ http://othellomaster.com
Non-profit search engine proposal @ http://iuron.com
Contact E-mail address (direct): s at schestowitz dot com
Contact Internet phone (SIP): schestowitz@xxxxxxxxx (24/7)
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