<H1>AN ODE To Microsoft</H1>
<H2>In response to an familiar phrase</H2>
> > They have stated that when Win2K is released,
> > they will roll out Hotmail on Windows2000/IIS 5.
<H3>The old familiar chorus:</H3>
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Of course the verses go something like.
Came the big show, MS-DOS it was unfurled.
But no one even noticed,
no one's hair even got uncurled.
So Billy made the key note speech saying,
"next year we'll get it right",
just PLEASE don't go spending,
all your money on UNIX tonight.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Windows was announced,
to be out by the Winter snows. <snow in seattle?>.
Through the big show and the demo,
everybody dosed.
But Billy made the keynote speech,
and said "well get it right"
So PLEASE don't spend
all your money on UNIX tonight.
New Technology (NT) was announced,
to be out by the sunny days <sun in seattle?>
They hyped in and they promoted,
in so many ingeneous ways.
But with all those nifty promises,
so bold, and so arrogantly brash,
when we finally got the real thing home
all the darn thing did was crash.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Billy made the keynote speech,
he promised "plug and play".
And no one got all that impressed,
Linux already had it anyway.
It came out with no bundleware,
they called it "an extension",
but every body knew,
it was Netscape and Linux prevention.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
At the keynote Bill said "trust me",
can a Billionaire be wrong?
You'd think those people had never heard
this familiar Bill Gates song.
They ported all their web sites,
and servers to 4.0
But when the budgets ran sky high,
the CEO said More? NO!!!
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
At the summer billy keynote.
Billy made a spectacular scene.
But what the people liked the most
was that pretty big blue screen.
Billy said we know it's buggy,
and we know it's very late
But you'll get every thing you've
ever wanted, in Windows 98.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
So Billy, getting frantic said
we'll call it Win2K,
Tell 'em any thing you want
Just keep those UNIX folks at BAY.
Billy called in all his boys
and said "we've got to get it right"
'Cause those folks have bought
loaded that Linux "thing" tonight.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Billy needed a new master stroke,
So he peddled Win M.E.
The thing was so darn awful,
He then Announced X.P.
When no one placed their orders.
The Numbers couldn't lie,
so Billy sent a nasty note
"Upgrade to XP - or DIE".
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Billy couldn't afford a new release,
so he published SP/2
When the people still kept buying Linux,
Billy said "let's have SCO Sue".
The claims were so absurd,
it made everybody laugh.
And Linux, Firefox and OSS
Their share increased to half.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
Billy then announced new Longhorn
But nobody gave a cheer.
Before the second beta,
It was no more than a steer.
They changed the name to Vista
Gave it License Arbitrage,
And all those nifty features
Were just a bad mirage.
But we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
And we'll all, go to heaven,
when the next release comes out.
The hardware venders and the corporates
Windows they so despised
That linux now was everywhere,
and Windows Virtualized.
Steve Ballmer shuddered at the news,
and rang the panic bell
Made deals with Linux Distributors,
to run in Virtual Hell.
(Copyright 1999,2007 Rex Ballard - released under terms of the GPL).
Feel free to post this on the BBS of your choice :-)
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